The Joker Attack Dog
by the stargate time traveller
Summary: The Joker has a few minutes to think before he meets Salvatore Valestra. Set in 'Mask of the Phantasm.'


Disclaimer - I don't own Batman in any sense. I just own this story.

Please let me know what you think.

* * *

The Joker Attack Dog.

Salvatore Valestra was coming to see him.

The Joker walked to one of the windows of the so-called 'House of the future' and he looked down upon the dilapidated ruins that were the World of the Future Fair; the fair had once been a popular tourist attraction, and as was typical with places like it eventually a combination of a lack of interest as more and more people stopped attending because they realised that despite several bits and pieces nothing was too realistic about the exhibits since many of them seemed to come out of a _Star Trek _movie or something like that, although the primary problem had been a lack of cash, the fair had become increasingly dilapidated until no-one barring a few teens who came out here on dates bothered to come.

In other words, the ruins were a perfect hiding spot for the Joker, especially after his last run in with Batman.

The Joker blew out a breath through his bright red lips as his brow furrowed, crinkling his already scarred, bleached white skin which made him look like a clown and he glanced over his shoulder to take in the small stack of newspapers that was on the battered sofa in this frankly pathetic if convenient little home, complete with a robot who did some of the cooking for him.

The newspapers were going wild with the story Batman was killing members of the mob, but what had made it worst and what had made Valestra seek him out was _Batman _seemed to be focusing on the old gang, of which Joker had once been part of himself…. when he had been somebody else, a long time ago.

There was no doubt in the Joker's twisted mind his old boss was coming to seek him out to find some way of taking Batman down, convinced he would be the only one who could do it. The Joker appreciated the logic, but he had his own doubts, though he wasn't truly surprised Valestra was seeking his help; it was kinda sad really, as he looked thoughtfully over the horizon of the fair where he could just make out the distant shapes of the Gotham skyline, once upon a time Sal Valestra had once been one of the biggest mob bosses in Gotham, with a fearsome reputation.

But now the golden days were gone. A combination of old age and ill health thanks to years of smoking and all kinds of abuse had reduced the man to a literal shell of his former self, but the Joker didn't pity his old boss. Nor did he particularly care what happened to him, but he was nonetheless curious about what was going on in Gotham right now with these gangster murders.

The Joker left the window and walked back to the sofa and thumbed through the collection until he picked up the one where a picture of Buzz Bronski, looking as fat as he was ageing before he'd been squashed like a fly underneath a swatter by that statue of an angel, the irony wasn't lost on the Joker considering how many people Buzz had murdered over the years. Near Buzz was a stock photo of Batman. The Joker studied the newspaper thoughtfully for a few minutes before he threw it away, and stalked back over the windows. Idly he checked his watch. Valestra said he was on his way to the fair, and Joker wanted to give the old fool a proper Joker-esque welcome, but he had plenty of time to do that.

Everyone in Gotham was convinced Batman was behind the gangster killings, not helped by _Gotham Gazette's _stories, which had spurred Valestra into seeking out his help in the first place, though Arthur Reeves hadn't helped either.

A sneer spread across his features which made his scarred face even more hideous to look at as he thought about the pompous backstabber; just because Reeves had helped Valestra's gang in finding Beaumont all those years ago did not mean Joker liked him, but truthfully he hadn't thought of the arrogant politician for a long time. Joker also wondered if Chuckies' death had made Reeves more ambitious, considering his earlier ties with the gang before he deemed it irrelevant, though he reminded himself that he also hadn't seen Reeves for years.

Perhaps it was time to change that, and maybe he could get a few facts right because there were just a few things he just was not clear on about the Beaumont mess although he knew enough to make Reeves' life a living hell if the politician made the mistake of pissing him off when they did meet, but what the Joker could not work out was why everyone believed Batman was behind the murders when they should be answering some very important questions.

Why was Batman committing murders _now, _ten years after he had first appeared in Gotham?

Why was he going after the former Valestra gang who had split up a long time ago when he could very easily have pressed them on his first week since they'd been more prominent then?

Why would Batman focus on three members of the mob, three aged gangsters - oh, he knew Batman had broken up a scheme by Sol to launder counterfeit money into his casino, but even if Sol had cornered the Batman, the Dork Knight would never commit murder - so why would he focus on them now like this?

If Batman was committing murder, then why wasn't he going after one of his more dangerous enemies such as Killer Croc or Riddler? Surely the enemies he had in his Rogues' Gallery would be on the top of his list, not a bunch of gangsters?

Reeves and a few others in the GCPD were automatically convinced Batman was behind this - the Joker was amused that several people whom Batman worked with quite often would believe the worst in him, but he guessed it made sense they would be suspicious of him; his _appearance _alone would make many people question his sanity - and they had already tried one plan to bring Batman in, but did they really think he would be gullible enough to fall for something as stupid as a lit Bat-Signal?

Batman was not stupid - he would know it was a trap right away.

Joker found it ironic - out of all the people in Gotham, aside from Jim Gordon of course - he was the only one convinced of Batman's innocence, although he'd never doubted it. Batman may have been a highly trained combatant, but everyone should have gotten it through their brains by now he was not a killer. It just wasn't in his nature.

The Joker realised he wasn't getting anywhere with his current thoughts since he still didn't have all the facts, as dear old Sherlock Holmes would demand before a case appeared in his lap, and he looked around his temporary hideout, mercifully silent of Harley's presence although the endless chop-chop-chop coming from the robot he'd named Hazel was sometimes irritating, though the good news was 'she' didn't bother him too much, and he decided to head down to greet Valestra, and hopefully get some answers.

* * *

"…..a nice big smile!" Joker leered at the aged face of Valestra.

The aged gangster was smiling back nervously, although when he felt the sudden tightening of his former hitman's arm around his neck which soon felt like a noose, Sal realised something was deadly wrong. "J-Joker? What are you doing?"

The Joker grinned cruelly at Valestra. "Why I am helping you out of course," he replied, "unfortunately, you will need to be bait."

"Bait?!" Valestra felt the stress was making it impossible for him to breath properly again, but the Joker had too tight a grip around his neck which stopped him from reaching out for his oxygen mask.

"Oh come on, did you really think I didn't recognise that fake cash? But that's not important to me," Joker went on talking while his free hand reached underneath the hem of his jacket to the hypodermic needle he'd prepared before the meeting. "Whoever it is who's killing the old gang, I want to find them, and truthfully this is for your own good."

Before Valestra had time to ask what was going on, or even to scream, Joker had stabbed him with the needle. Valestra was taken by surprise by the pain for a moment before he had the mad desire to laugh, and he began laughing so hard, cackling madly like a wicked witch who'd stolen a child to boil alive in a cauldron under the full moon. He laughed so hard his already wasted lungs were torn apart by the agony they were under.

Dimly he heard the Joker laugh as well, and just as darkness clouded Salvatore Valestra's vision he wished he had never contacted the Joker, that he had accepted Reeves' offer for police protection…

* * *

Getting the scene ready for when the killer would come calling hadn't been difficult; Valestra's home in Gotham may have had bars fitted to the windows which gave it the appearance of a castle with its drawbridge raised, but it was no problem if you had the key thoughtfully left behind. All the Joker had done was take the body back and he'd spent a few minutes getting the atmosphere right; he'd built a fire for his old boss while sitting Valestra in his armchair, and he'd even prepared a few biscuits while putting a newspaper in the dead man's grasp. It helped rigour mortis was setting in which made it easy for the Joker to manipulate Valestra's bony fingers, while he placed a radio-camera with a mike on the old gangster's lap. Joker knew something was going to happen soon, and he wanted to see every moment.

He had also placed high explosives in the house. When everything was set, all he had to do was wait. The Joker wasn't really bothered by the passage of time, not since he had a few comic books in front of him. He had learnt patience a long time ago as a kid when he'd started his criminal career, and when he had been Valestra's hitman, he had known one day he would have the opportunity to build himself up as a criminal. His frequent visits and escapes to Arkham had taught him to look out for the best opportunities to escape as well. It helped that he knew someone was icing his old gang, and that it would only be a matter of time before the killer came.

Suddenly it came over the mike when he heard a deep growling voice. When he heard it, Joker snapped back into full alertness and switched on the camera, but all it could pick up at the moment was the blackness caused by the newspaper which was blocking the view of the lens though some light from the fire was filtering through.

"_Sal Valestra. Your angel of death awaits…," _the voice threatened before the blackness was gone, and Joker saw the skull-like visage of someone who reminded him of the ghost of Christmas future.

So it was someone else.

Now to try his luck. His finger went to the detonator control while he pressed the mike button to send a nice little message…


End file.
